Just Because

There really is no point to this blog. I just wanted to say these things before I go babysit.

It's been an interesting time trying to sleep tonight because of two reasons:

1. I was almost completely out the door at 3:37 to go babysit, then realized I was an hour early.

2. I just got woken up in the middle of the climax of a nightmare.. I'm a little shaken up to say the least.

I still have some time before I need to leave, but I'm wide awake and not going back to sleep.

For lack of a better phrase, holy crap.

Finding Joy

Yesterday was a bad day. I was very sick, and not really myself. All I could think was "Can January come any quicker???"

I don't WANT to think that for the rest of the time that I'm here.

I haven't even heard back from Biola yet, which makes that thought all the more miserable because if I don't get accepted, January will come and go like every other month.

So I decided that today, even if something big doesn't happen, I'm going to find joy in the little things I often look passed.

It's not even noon yet, and I've already felt blessed joy in so many different things. So much so that I don't even want to wait on this blog. I felt as if I must post it now.

Today, I love... (not in any particular order)

Hot tea with honey and cream (it's become a new daily ritual), new music, good health, The Smiths, the weather, my best friend being in town, water, my house (I'm really going to miss it when my family moves), my hair (it looks surprisingly decent for putting it up while it was still wet), the ability to write/type out my thoughts, Jesus, Stephen Morales for the awesome opportunities he continues to throw my way, Biola, being able to hang out with my friends tomorrow night, my best friends making their dream come true by going on tour, laundry, my parents, this day.

I hope to expand this throughout the day, but probably won't post it.

I'm trying to remember that some of the best parts of the day are often missed because I'm so focused on something bigger and better to happen. I should rejoice in what I have now, because that's more than enough.

January will get here when it's supposed to.

Putting My Passion to Good Use

I like to write... Obviously.

With how much I have going on it's hard for me to keep in touch with a lot of people that I care about. Lately, I've been trying to think of ways to stay in their lives even when I can't physically be there.

I've decided that I will start writing to the people I love.

Letters, texts, Facebook comments, whatever.

Little things to say to them to make them smile, and know that I love them.

Even just thanking them for being such a blessing.

I'm tired of feeling so disconnected from the world. Hopefully this will change that :)

Maybe...

Maybe it's the song that I'm listening to. Or maybe it's the weather bringing it out. Or maybe it's just because I'm addressing some of my innermost spiritual feelings. But writing this essay for Biola is making me emotional... I feel like I haven't even made a dent into it yet.

Must. Do. This. Now.

Can't. Cry. In. Public.

Maybe I need a break?

No Explanation Necessary

"For to live is Christ, and to die is gain."

--Philippians 1:21

Worry-Wart

A few days ago, I wrote a journal entry about something that was on my heart: Worrying. I read through it today and decided to post it to the internet.

Worrying: 8/31

"Lately, I've been worrying a lot. Last night, after a long night at work, I was stressed. All of a sudden I felt this overwhelming amount of comfort. It was as if God was trying to tell me that it's okay, and that He will take my burdens. He wanted me to sleep, and prepare for the next day.

I always try to remember that if I'm worried, and feel like, "Okay God, help me out! Why aren't you doing anything?" it just means that He's not worried so I shouldn't be either. :)"

I also posted a couple verses that really helped me 'feel the love'

Matthew 6:25-27: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Isn't there more to life than food and more to the body than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky: They do not sow, or reap, or gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren't you more valuable than they are? And which of you by worrying can add even one hour to his life?"

Matthew 11:28: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

I've had Matthew 11:28 in my head all week, and I really find it a huge comfort in my current life. I needn't be such a worry-wart :P

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In other news, I FINALLY finished The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe! I laughed, I cried, and I fell in love with Aslan. Such a wonderful book. I can't wait to read the rest!

2 down, 5 to go..

Next up: The Horse and His Boy

Meet Berlioz...

The newest addition to my life :)

Currently playing: Always Forever by Phil Wickham

Roller Coaster.

I'm not sure what I did wrong, but apparently it was enough to be ignored by one of the people I care for most.

Should I be surprised? Probably not.

It seems to happen every few months.

I thought maybe this time would be different, though.

Please, please, please stop.

This roller coaster is really painful.

I love you, I really do.

I wish you could be consistent..